Tag Archives: couples therapy Nashville

What is a Marriage and Family Therapist?

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Hi, my name is Christa Booker. I’m currently a Marriage and Family Therapy intern at The Happy Hour. You may recognize me from my previous work as a certified holistic life coach, a journey I began in 2020 at the onset of COVID-19. During my time working with individuals and groups at The Happy Hour, I noticed a significant pattern: relationships in my clients’ lives were shifting, influenced by the unique challenges of the pandemic. As I supported them through these changes, my curiosity deepened, and I developed a new passion for understanding the dynamics of human relationships. The relationships we form are essential to our overall well-being, and I became eager to explore this further. 

 

Now, I am pursuing a graduate degree in Marriage and Family Therapy at Lipscomb University. I am currently an intern where I work with individual clients, families and couples under supervision.

 

The title “Marriage and Family Therapist” can be a bit misleading. Like all counseling professionals, I address a range of individual and relational issues. The distinctive training of an MFT focuses on understanding relational systems. We examine patterns of interaction and cycles within families, always considering the broader context of a person’s life. My approach is holistic, viewing problems in the context of the entire relational system, not just the individual. Whether working with an individual, couple, or family, I take into account the complex influences of interaction, beliefs, culture, upbringing, and relationships to better understand and address the challenges my clients face. 

 

So the basics of what an MFT is summed up best from the AAMFT website: We will focus on understanding your symptoms within interactions and relationships. The existing environment and context is given careful examination paying particular attention to the family system – as defined by you.  MFTs treat predominantly individuals but always from the perspective that “relationships matter.”

 

Work with Christa at a Reduced Rate!

Enjoy a reduced intern rate on one-on-one or duo therapy with Christa while she completes her master’s degree in Marriage and Family Counseling. If you’ve worked with Christa previously, you’ll know that this is a steal!

Supervision will be provided indirectly by one of our licensed therapists while Christa is practicing at The Happy Hour.

 

Book now

Better Relationships with Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)

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From the cradle to the grave, humans desire a certain someone who will look out for them, notice and value them, soothe their wounds, reassure them in life’s difficult places, and hold them in the dark.

Sue Johnson, Ph.D., creator of Emotionally Focused Therapy

 

Ah, Valentine’s Day. A day full of expensive dinner reservations, flowers, and candy, but often also full of expectations that may or may not be fulfilled. Often in my work with couples, I see unmet expectations from one or both partners, and the inevitable deterioration of connection as a result. As you may imagine, most couples’ dissatisfaction is rarely about the flowers or candy, but the absence of a feeling of connection, love, and being valued.

 

I recently completed an EFT externship at Trevecca University, and was blown away by the work of Sue Johnson and others regarding attachment, conflict patterns, and restoration of connection in couples. The intensive 4 day training reinforced a belief I already knew in my heart- that couples don’t struggle because one person likes to spend more money than the other, or one person leaves the dishes in the sink. They struggle because they are insecurely attached to one another and are not experiencing the connection humans are born needing.

 

So, what is Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)?

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a therapeutic approach designed to enhance the emotional connection and security within relationships. It focuses on identifying and reshaping negative patterns of interaction, fostering communication, and ultimately promoting a more secure and satisfying bond between individuals.

 

How can Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) help me and my partner with our connection?

Think of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) as relationship magic. It dives deep into the emotional stuff, helping couples figure out their quirks and needs. EFT transforms the “weird tension” moments into a tag-team of understanding, so partners can communicate better and trust more. 

 

How can I get started on repairing connection with my partner?

I cannot recommend ‘Hold Me Tight’, by Dr. Sue Johnson enough as a starting point! Check it out here. Couples therapy is also helpful to bring in an unbiased guide to reconnection.

 

 

THE CONTENT OF THIS BLOG IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY. IT IS NOT A SUBSTITUTE FOR A THERAPEUTIC RELATIONSHIP.

 

Book couples therapy and explore Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) with Amy Jackson, LCSW-MPH here.

Couples Therapy: Not Just for Rough Patches

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Choosing to go through life with someone by your side is a wonderful thing, but that doesn’t mean relationships aren’t hard work. Couples therapy is a great way to strengthen or rebuild your connection, navigate tough times, and check-in to nip issues in the bud before they become a problem.  

 

Think of your relationship as a car and your therapist like a mechanic. You’re not going to wait until the wheels fall off before taking it to a mechanic, right? You’re going to go for regular oil changes and tune ups so that the car can keep running smoothly without you being blind-sided by problems. And if the wheels do come off? Well, then it’s definitely time for some overdue maintenance and repairs.

 

We spoke to The Happy Hour therapists Amy Jackson, LCSW-MPH, and Jeannette Diddens, LCSW, to get the inside scoop on couples therapy.

 

1. Who can benefit from couples therapy? Is it just for married or premarital couples?

 

AJ: It’s my opinion that EVERYONE could benefit from couples therapy! It’s so crucial to get a baseline of effective communication, understanding and friendship to promote a long-lasting relationship. Of course, those who are suffering relationship wounds (i.e. infidelity, substance use, and other trust issues) would benefit from a longer duration of sessions and intervention. 

 

There’s also no reason to wait until something goes wrong- even dating couples can see positive results from a neutral third party perspective on their most common relationship conflicts. In fact, it’s protective to have early intervention and practice in communication.

 

JD: I love it when I see a couple come in for premarital therapy. They learn some tools before big life events happen, so they can be prepared for what’s to come. 

 

2. What are some common issues or topics that you see in couples therapy?

 

AJ: Other than the common issues of trust violations (infidelity, dishonesty about substances or money), a loss of connection is a big issue I see. Friendship is central to the health of a relationship, and it’s also the easiest aspect to fall to the wayside with the busyness of life. One thing I love working with couples on is how to reconnect to your partner and rebuild that friendship- once fondness and admiration are re-established (Gottman’s theory), couples are better able to engage in productive conflict resolution. 

 

JD: I used to say I was going to write a book titled  “Sex and dirty dishes”, because for a while I saw a trend of couples arguing about those 2 topics. The frequency of intimacy and the distribution of household chores seem to come up often. What lies beneath that is loneliness in their marriage or feelings of not being valued. 

 

3. You both love the Gottman methods and theories – what’s so great about it?

 

AJ: I love anything research-based and practical, and Gottman’s theory delivers so many great exercises and tips. I also find it to be approachable for people who are new to therapy, which is a big plus for people who may feel hesitant with vulnerability. 

 

JD: It’s the best that we have as far as 50 plus years of data from couples counseling. You can’t argue with data. 

 

4. What can I expect in a couples therapy session?

 

AJ: I like to get a thorough history of the relationship and always want to incorporate what actually works in the partnership. It’s so easy to get bogged down by the stress and turmoil of the day-to-day that I find it helpful to investigate what connection is still there (whether it be past or present). After gaining a thorough knowledge of the couple, I like to give ample time to both parties to explore their biggest issues in their relationship, and ensure each partner feels heard. I am also a big proponent of homework for couples therapy. There’s only so much that can be accomplished in a 50 min therapy session; the couple is on the hook for the hard work of rebuilding their connection. 

 

JD: I am a strengths based therapist, so I start with identifying their partners strengths. I try to set a great foundation in the room so we can all come to an understanding of why it is, we care enough about each other to be in couples counseling.  

 

5. Can couples therapy help people who are in the process of divorce (or already divorced) co-parent more effectively?

 

AJ: 100%. The communication issues don’t go away once you divorce; in fact, unless some of the resentment and hurt is worked through, more suffering is inevitable. I can help couples come up with a plan that works for both of them while centering their children’s needs. Children are just innocent bystanders in a relationship dissolution, and it’s crucial that their lives are as undisturbed as possible with the foundation of a co-parenting plan. 

 

JD: Yes. Couples therapy can play a valuable role for individuals going through a divorce in several ways. They learn how to communicate better, they can gain co-parenting assistance and they can gain more understanding of themselves to take to their other relationships. Overall, I think it also provides closure for each person going forward.

 

If you’d like to learn more about couples therapy, give us a call at the studio, 615-953-3934, or book online.

 

THE CONTENT OF THIS BLOG IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY. IT IS NOT A SUBSTITUTE FOR A THERAPEUTIC RELATIONSHIP.